Sunday, December 31, 2006

31st December 2006

Woke up around 11:30 this morning. Had a great night’s sleep accompanied by one of the longest and best dreams I can remember. It was a typical dream in that is was kind of odd. There were people from years gone by involved, but they had taken different personas and nationalities. I kept switching from country to country. First, it was Canada, then the coast of Scotland, and finally ending up in Liverpool. I have never visited Liverpool, so fail to know why it was included. Also, a lot of recent things that have been on my mind were included in the dream and I felt refreshed this morning because it seemed that all of those thoughts had just been put through a spin cycle and are now out on the line drying in the wind. A bird will probably shit on them but then that is something that seems inevitable. Where was I going with this, I have no idea?

Today is New Years Eve and time for that all singing, all dancing anti-climax that hits every year. What to do and where to go to see the New Year in? All my mates seem to have no clue either. I picked up my cell phone from the bedside table and flicked through the address book. I have had the phone for months now and had copied the numbers over from my old phone, but, I haven’t bothered to clean out the useless crap that has built up in the two years I have been here in Taiwan. Decided that now was a good a time as any and set about deleting numbers I no longer needed. I must have gone through about 10 contacts that are not even living in Taiwan anymore. One or two I had forgotten about completely and it took a little while to bring it back them back to memory.

Of those people not living here anymore I got to thinking what they were doing now and what their plans might be for celebrating tonight. Were they happy? Were they thinking about the year past and what is in store for the next? It seems most of us are in the same boat at this time but quite often I feel that the oars are most definitely missing. The direction we can travel is currently undecided and perhaps beyond our control. Even if it is, do we really have control as anything could be around the next bend? Do I have any resolutions? Become more organised, lose weight, and become less stressed. Take your pick.

I’ve been reading a lot lately and read quite a bit on philosophy in a bid to help me understand more about the facets of the world in which we live and gain a bit more perspective about the human condition. Sounds pretentious, I know! However, I must admit that I consider myself of average intelligence and often find things which are too detailed hard going. The books I am reading are a bit more accessible I think than dragging through an in depth analysis of a particular philosopher and until I hit on something which really interests me to explore further I will continue on this path. I neither have the time, patience nor brain matter to comprehend it all. Nevertheless, it’s interesting to see how others have viewed life and what the point of it all is. For your info the books are Alain De Botton’s “Consolations of Philosophy” and his latest book “How Proust Can Change Your Life.”

I often lie awake at night wondering about what the hell everything is for? Is there a god? Why is society the way it is and why we hold the values we hold? I think living in a different culture kind of forces these perspectives to the front of your mind. You can become bitter and discontent when you see the way things are done on a daily basis in a country like Taiwan, and it is all too easy to compare them with what you see as ‘normal’ from your home country. I have had plenty of chats with other foreign friends here and discussed the Taiwanese culture thing to death, but still I find more and more things on a daily basis that either fascinate me or annoy the shite out of me, depending on what side of the bed I got out of. In actual fact, it would be quite easy to write off some of the cultural aspects of this country as small minded and materialistic, but I can’t help but think of the parallels between what I see amongst the majority of people here and those I have witnessed at home or in other countries. I think as humans we all share the same feelings and emotions, but because of the values we hold from our respective societies those feelings and emotions are experienced and expressed differently, often in ways that an outsider would consider ridiculous, childish, exaggerated or even impolite. I find myself becoming more an more accepting of things that at first seemed alien, but I allow myself time to see them from the perspective of which they sprung and more often than not find an interesting reason or justification for their existence.

Moving to a recent example to further clarify. I recently visited the doctor, a dermatologist to be exact, about a terrible dermatitis type rash on my scalp. I have had it on and off for a couple of years now and tried a host of creams, solutions, medicines etc. but to no avail. I also went to get my yearly health check done at the hospital last week. (It is a requirement by the government of Taiwan that all foreigners be examined prior to renewing or applying for their resident and working visas.) The first observation on the healthcare system in Taiwan is that from what I have seen it beats the shit out of the one at home aside from the fact the communication barrier can be a little hard at times. I don’t need to wait for months to see a specialist; I can usually see one immediately or at least within 24 hours. I simply rocked up to the clinic and the hospital and waltzed in with no appointment. Within 5 minutes I was in front of an English speaking doctor getting to the heart of what was needed.

According to the dermatologist, it seems my rash is compounded further through stress and lack of sleep. Hardly surprising given my lifestyle. I was prescribed some medicine and told that I would probably need a few visits before it healed. However, it is a condition that will never disappear, but it can be controlled. Other doctors had failed to tell me this and so I became annoyed when it kept reappearing. Things are on the mend but it itches like hell and being told I can’t scratch it because it makes it worse is like a mischievous child being told, “Whatever you do, don’t press this button.” I gave in this morning and went apeshit with my fingernails in the shower. It was fucking orgasmic!

Anyway, the main observation is that the door to a doctor’s office in Taiwan is largely left open and quite often more than one patient will be in the treatment room, listening in on each other’s medical woes. Largely embarrassing given that we westerners respect and demand privacy for such matters. I couldn’t help feeling that there was something wonderful about this though in that Taiwanese people could accept that the body gets sick and we are all the same. OK, for certain problems, I think many would like privacy, but if something happens to our body, it is most often not within our control and should be largely accepted as being ok and something that we shouldn’t be embarrassed about. I still shut the door though out of habit added to the fact that I didn’t fancy being stared at as “the foreigner with a problem” by the two elementary school kids sitting in the waiting room outside.

Keeping with the culture in Taiwan I have had some interesting chats with a friend of mine, who shall remain nameless, about relationships in Taiwan. Coupled with this you can always find articles in the local foreign magazine publications circling around about women in Taiwan and the consensus appears largely in favour for saying most Taiwanese girls are pretty shallow or narrow-minded. Perhaps that is too much of a blanket statement and the words I chose were maybe a little exaggerated. I find that most girls will blank over when the subject gets too heavy or they simply don’t want to talk about something like that and instead, seem more interested in shopping, empty fashion chat shows on TV and talking about other people’s relationships. My own experience with my current girlfriend, who is also Taiwanese, quite often brings me to the same conclusions. Language barriers and different backgrounds obviously contribute, but then if I had the skill to talk about such subjects in Chinese, I would surely be off gassing to my hearts content. Last week I was sat in bed and I wrote this short attempt at a poem which might best sum up recent conversations with friends.

My Origami Girl

Beautiful lines,
folded and unfolded,
by other hands,
and now, in mine,
you let me shape you,
all the while,
careful not to slice myself,
on your razor edges,
I’m no artist or master,
but it doesn’t take long to discover,
beneath the careful folds,
lies a blank piece of paper.


So, the New Year beckons, and we take salt from the year and years passed and move forward. To what I am not sure, but as John Lennon so finely put it, “Life is what happens while you are making other plans.”

I couldn’t agree more.

Peace